‘Battling Anxiety & Being Brave’
Hi! My name’s Monica, and I’m a Mediterranean-English girl from London. I’m currently studying English Language and Linguistics at university, and am running a blog documenting my adventures through life, as well as travel, food and fitness finds (or anything else that tickles my fancy). With my blog, I aim to create a space to inspire, educate and even give people a bit of a laugh, which I also aim to carry out in my day-to-day life.
Something I used to do very much in the past was label myself as ‘shy, until you get to know me better’. I’ve struggled with anxiety massively for years, and I still continue to battle on to this day, which I believe has supported my own claim to being shy in the past. However, there have been three major influences that have changed my mindset and overall persona: university, my blog, and the pandemic.
University allowed me to meet some amazing people, and really throw myself into the deep end. Now, coming to the end of my university journey, I truly feel that I am closer to becoming the person I want to be: fun-loving, brave, and outspoken (see what I did there?) Starting my blog was probably one of the bravest things I have ever done: I had dreamt of starting a blog since I was sixteen, and after battling with my own thoughts and failed attempts of creating a blog space for myself, I finally created one at the beginning of 2020. Since then, I’ve felt like blogging is something I was absolutely supposed to do – I would even go as far as saying made to do.
Whilst writing is subjective, I have come to learn not to be afraid of what others may say, and to write because I love it, which has always been the case. My character has truly developed since beginning to create this space: I’ve learnt to be bold, creative, more hard-working, and even unafraid (but it’s a work in progress always). And finally, the pandemic. You may be thinking “the pandemic was a tragedy, how could it possibly have changed your persona?” Yes, it was a tragedy, but it gave me time to work on myself.
I started putting myself out there on the Instagram space to develop my blog; I started working out more consistently, which has bettered my health and made me more confident in myself; and I had time to think about myself, and the label I had put on myself. I don’t have time to be labelling myself as something I no longer want to be, so why do I keep doing it? I am not letting it define me anymore, for it is not who I am anymore.
To be outspoken… means to not care what others say. Be yourself always, no matter what you think people may say. What you think deserves to be heard. Your story deserves to be heard – you never know who you may influence.
I choose to be outspoken because… I’m tired of fitting myself into a box that no longer feels right – I just had to wake up and realise I have one life, and I’m not about to waste it. This is my opportunity.
When I was in the early stages of my blog, I was not as outspoken as I could have been. I was scared of others’ opinions. A friend then gave me a very harsh truth: you’re never going to get anywhere in life if you keep caring what others think. Well, I do want to get far in life, and that was exactly the wake-up call I needed. Remember, every day is a work in progress for all of us, but never forget to choose to be outspoken always.